July 3rd, Franz Kafka’s Birthday

3 July. The broadening and heightening of existence through marriage. Sermon text. But I almost sense it.
When I say something it immediately and finally loses its importance, when I write it down it loses it too, but sometimes gains a new one.
A band of little golden beads around a tanned throat.

Diaries, Franz Kafka

July 3rd is the birthday of Tom Cruise, myself, and the great writer Franz Kafka. This year was a calm and peaceful one, and I looked up what Franz Kafka wrote on his birthday in the past.

Often, Kafka was traveling on his birthday. The idea is a great one. He was even able to write some small amount on his birthday.

‘Mistaken,’ he repeated, and moved his index finger along the lines to calm their restlessness.

Diaries, Franz Kafka

Often Kafka is simply listing the images of what he sees, demonstrating his interest in the complex lives of children. I’ve felt a similar cloudiness on our birthday. I don’t know what to do with myself. This feeling is especially true on major milestone birthdays, like 40. There’s a feeling that I need to do something significant. But the feeling paralyzes me, as if because of it I can do nothing but wander through my environment observing and noting whatever I sense. Is that so bad on one’s birthday?

Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag, Franz Kafka! I thank you for confirming my bafflement on our birthday.